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It will read slow. It will underwhelm you. It feels raw and clunky, painful and delightful, new skin underneath a scab. The present moment moves in.

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I sway a little in the voting booth and hum. I am happy. I am floating. I am recreated. She is tucked onto my chest like a curly frog, as are millions of babies across the globe worn by mothers who work or walk or are lucky enough to vote.

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I am watching my own vanishing. My disappearing feels almost deserved. Hillary losing only made it truer. Where is she now? Would her winning have kept me here? Us women. We are shelters and protectors and cheerleaders and holders and radiators and goal posts.

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I want to be. Hillary probably stood in mesh white underwear after birthing Chelsea and found her own eyes in the mirror and decided not to go anywhere, not to disappear. Except being everything for.

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My showerhead is an asshole. Why am I lucky? That question haunts me.

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